It’s kinda a weird feeling

Whelp, it’s been an interesting weekend for me.  I went out with the girl I’m dating.  That was actually really exciting, because I hadn’t been able to see her for some time.  I had her Christmas present still and I was excited to get that to her, and I was honestly just happy to have some time with her.  Most interesting to me about it though was that… well, for once, I wasn’t so utterly nervous about the date that I near panicked about it on the way over.

I still remember the first time I went over to get her, I still needed to get flowers.  I was so incredibly nervous that I was shaking.  It was the first date that I had in a good while, but I was excited because I’ve been friends with her for quite some time.  I’d always liked her and tried to date her years before.  I didn’t exactly use the word date then, though.  What can I say?  I was young(er) and dumb(er), as well as much more awkward.  It was my own fault that it didn’t work out.

This though, was something new.  I actually asked her on a date, and things seemed to be going well between us before it.  But being me, I was nothing but a ball of nervousness thinking about how things were gonna go wrong, and how it would be all my fault.  Then, something amazing happened:  things went swimmingly. Had a good night, got a big hug when I gave her the flowers, and had fun the whole time.

We went out a few more times, each fun, but each a little nerve racking for me, just due to me worrying about anything and everything I’m involved with.  The last date we went on, dinner and then the midnight premiere  of “Harry Potter And The Deathly Hallows Part 1” was the least nervous I had been for a date.  Slight apprehension on if I could still do things right, but overall, some excitement about it.

This was something completely new.  No apprehension, no worries, just being excited and happy to be going out with someone like her.  It’s really nice to experience.  I sit and wonder if that’s what it feels like for everyone else most of the time.  If so, I’ll be really glad to keep it.


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